Your Birthdate: September 29

Your birthday on the 29th adds a tone of idealism to your nature. You are imaginative and creative, but rather uncomfortable in the business world. You are very aware and sensitive, with outstanding intuitive skills and analytical abilities. The 29 reduces to 11, one of the master numbers which often produces much nervous tension. This is the birthday of the dreamer rather than the doer. You do, however, work very well with people.

My libra love profile
Your positive traits:

You are open minded enough to date outside your typical "type" ... successfully!
You are diplomatic - and likely to end a fight instead of dragging things out.
You are easily loyal and faithful, but only for the right person.

(this is tottaly dead on)

Your negative traits:

You're a bit gullible, and partners take advantage of you. You still may not know it.
You find it difficult to decide where to go to dinner, what movie to watch, who to date...
You have to be in a relationship, or else you just don't feel like yourself.

(to a certain extent i am a bit indecicive)

Your ideal partner:

A smooth talker who enjoys socializing as much as you to.
Someone classy and cultured who knows which wine to order with dinner.
Is beautiful to you - although not necessarily attractive in the traditional sense.

(dead on)

Your dating style:

Romantic. If your date comes bearing flowers, wine, and poetry... well, your heart soars.

Your seduction style:

Giving. Your lover's pleasure is as important as your own. (dead on)
Soft and sensual - you don't like anything to be rough. pfft sooo wrong
Extravagant ... your fantasy involves staying at a five star hotel with your love. not even close but it is nice


Tips for the future:

Don't be so quick to compromise in relationships - and you'll get taken advantage of yes.
Try being single for a while. Seems impossible, but you'll learn so much about yourself from doing so.
Make some decisions about your romantic life, right now. You'll be happy that you did. ( and this is why i posted this i agree whole heartedly)

You Are 18 Years Old

18 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

atsrology is scary
Your Libra Drinking Style

"I'm jusht a social drinker," you slur, "it's jusht that I'm so damn social?"
You love nothing more than to party, mingle and relate to everyone.
Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with Insta-Friend device set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side (you are little instigators when bored), you can really work a room.

Charming as you are, you are notoriously lacking in self-control.
And this can get you into all sorts of trouble -- including wearing their wobbly boots waaaay too early in the evening.
You may end up flirting with you best friend's sweetie or even blacking out the night's events entirely. Oops!



thats so dead on its scary

(this was orignially writen on thursday but i decded to post it today)

a long time coming
So i met up with phil today.
I went in to this "talk" fully expecting that we were gonna take a 1 month break from each other just so we could sort things out.

We ended up tottaly broken up instead.

He said alot of things that surprised me. that unless somthing majour changes theres no point in gettting back together. The most surprising is that changed when i went into the buisness faculty. that i wasnt the same person and i guess not in a good way.

I never noticed b4 but i guess i did change alot when i switched over....add that to my list of things to ponder

If i had known going into buisness would have ruined our relationship i never would have done it. Add this to the list of reasons i hate my faculty.

I know we had alot of issues but wow its over.

I got home kinda shell shocked and could only get a hold of allision but she had soem stuff to do. so i faked being happy while the folks were around it was tough but i managed. To think i have been thinking about telling them about me and phil alot recently.

made myself som taquitos almost went for quiznos but i know that would have been to much for me...(phil and i used to go for quiznos once a month as like a date celibration thing) i didnt want to be crying as i ordered lol

so after the floks left i tried to drink but we dont have much alcohol so i couldnt really get drunk enough. Didnt have any icecream or chocolate
or cheese for nachos and i was too tipsy to go shopping in the car. So i figured killing things on the xbox would make me happy so i go to get all the stuff only to find that my bro hid all the games.

so i pnaicked cuz i had nothing to do and this overwhelming lonliness set in. tried to call ppl but no one asnwerd
then i called phil

i dont know why i wanted to make sure he was ok
i think i secretly wanted him to say that he wanted me back


par for the course however today he said none of the above.

its funny our "song" was "try" by nelly furtado and i always thought it was such a beutiful love song. But there is a line in it

"all of the momments that already past try to go back and make them last. All of the things we want eachotehr to be , we never will be , we never will be that wonderful. thats life"

And i realize how prophetic it is

i still hope one day that we will both be as wonderful

a reply
I sometimes forget that i am not the best comunicator. soo im trying to make this straight forward.

The progress u have made has been great and i am not belittling that at all. You sound like yur on the way to becoming a much healthyer fuller person so kudos!

If u recall about 3 weeks ago we dicussed that it was probably a good idea for some emotional distance this was supposed to help insure that what you were doing u were doing for yurself and not for me. So that really isnt my issue its a necessary evil that i can deal with ( im a big boy after all)

I ultimatly want you to be happy with yourself and not worry about what others think including me. And this is a key issue. Your whole life has been lived to other peoples standards and i dont want you trading theres for mine.

Find the path in life that makes you complete becasue every person should be happy with themselves whether they are in or out of a relationship.

I am not yet convinced that I am the person on this world that will make u happiest and reading yur blog made me realize that you were feeling the same way.

I have been thinking about alot of things the past few weeks. if we better friends than partners
if we could use some temporary time apart which i feel would help u figure yur life out.
if we should just throw in the towel and admit that we tried really hard but ultimatly the chick on Omni tv was right.

I know this proces has been hard on you but it has also be emotionally exauhsting for me. I have been cranky this week so when i read what u had said that only made my mood worse when u said "we really need to talk" And then my stomach started to hurt. i realized that thats how it always is between us. When i say im tired of "talking" i mean that im tired of being draged through an emotional grinder every 2 weeks for the past 5 months. I cant even rember the last time we were both even 95% happy with each other around when we arnt naked.
I enjoyed talking to you tonight it was fun but i still worry that your to concerned with making me happy. I want a somone i can spend my life with as an equal parner i dont want a puppy. I know that spark is still there buried somewhere but i still feel it.

I am not writing this to piss u off or hurt u. Much of this we have talked about before. This is more of an explanation of the conflicts i am feeling right now which is why i blogged it rather than emailing it to you.

and the rumbling in the distance erupted forth bathing the land in it's fury
Now Playing: crapy opera music at work
last night i had the worst night of sleep ever! it was soo hot in my room that i ddint fall asleep till about 3. Then at around 4:10 ish it started to thunder and lightining. It was unlike any storm i had ever seen! Uusally i love looking out my window (cuz i can see for many km) and watchignt he storm roll by. But everything was so incredibly intesnse.. The ligthning was almost cosant and it was close very close. The rain was so bad i could barely see down the street. we acctually thought a couple of trees were going to fall over in the back yard. It was very intense.

I didnt end up falling back to sleep till about 5:30 but even then it was one of those nights where u never really get back to sleep fully.

Im a bit of a cranky camper right now.

Went to my first pride parade on the weekend. it poored buckets and was pretty chilly but it was ok lots of ppl there. we ended up going shopping and for greek food with sky paul lucas and allison . then we saw batman begins all in all a great night. bought a super sexy shirt too!

sunday got piss ass drunk off of tequila and made an assof myself. Lets not get into that.

things with phil have been up and down as usuall. I dont know what to do anymore. Im trying to be supportive and understanding but nothing seems to work.

i want to move to a far away place where no one knows me and i can start again. thats my urge right now.

whatever

Nothign is ever resolved! Im taking tommorow off from my life...taking a 1 day vaction for me! to get away from me see if i can be something else heres a list of things that describe me thought they would be fun

Part Freaky Kisser

When you kiss, you want to experience something new A new technique, a new partner, a new piercing... And your own personal kissing style is very unpredictable There's no saying where your tongue or hands will go

Part Passionate Kisser

For you, kissing is about all about following your urges If someone's hot, you'll go in for the kiss - end of story You can keep any relationship hot with your steamy kisses A total spark plug - your kisses are bound to get you in trouble

Your Drag Queen Name is: Felicia Fellatio

wierd poast today

Back at it waiting ofr a better sign
Now Playing: watching we craven's cursed
so its been a strange week
Nessa my bros gf whos livingt with us was hit by a car on thursday it was a hit and run but no one can identify the driver so the punk kid is gonna get away with it. Nessa is ok no broken bones just need to have somoen keep an eye on her cuz she is concussed.

Spent time with phil last night. We had a great night at the begining then the wierdes thing happend. We were channel surfingt on his satelight tv and this woman come on on the omni channel. She starts in this rant talking dirrectly (it felt) to us about how couplse where the 2 ppl are opposites are doomed! and she went on and on....it was like a sign from god or something. It kid of put a bit of a damper on things cuz bassically our oppositness has been the cause of TON of issues latley.

to top things off i found out he went though my chat logs when i borrowed his laptop after chels' going away party. Needless to say i was irked that he would do that! it was such hmmm like an invasion of privacy. Like he doesnt trust me or somehting.

i dunno what i should think right now.
He apologised said he didnt feel it was an invasion of privacy at all because it was his computer seems pretty lame to me but whateve i cant stay mad.

we ended up going to NEW CITY for Ev's grad party. Its like a goth alternative punk bar. It was soo cool there was no attitude at all everone just goes and dances their assess off. I have never been in a place with sucha cool accepting atmosphere even at the gay bar. needless to say i danced my ass off.

well thats all for now

the only bright spot today is triump the insult dog and chocolate
Now Playing: that crappy elevator music they play at my office
so im cranky
work is really starting to piss me off and im begining to realize how poorly run it is and how shitty they treat me. Im beginign to wonder how important the work im doing is.

Im seeing ppl form highschool moving on with their lives and being sucessful (driving new cadillacs Screw u brendon)!!and here i am working for a company that took my office away expects me to use my laptop for buisness usage and overall treats me with indifference. I know its nto just me they treat like that but its kinda a harsh realization that im working my ass off to further 2 other ppls' careers and im getting very little out of it. They pay the bare minimum that they can and the exclude me from any of the credit. Im begining think i should just take the data and fuck them over royally after all its 90% my work.

I need a change in every area of my life however im not sure how to go about changing myself. Im still not sure what flaw in my character or in the enviroment is causing me to be not as suscessful as i could be. I doubt its the enviroment unless the "man" really is trying to keep me down.
So if anyone has anythoughts as to why i m such a pussy please leave a comment (not that anyone reads this anyway)

:(