Oddness to the max
so the potographer from time magazine came and i didnt get my pic taken...oh well international super stardom will have to wait a little while longer.

Met up with phil for coffe and that went ok it wasnt as awkward as i was worried it was going to be. We walked to qiznos for a sub and the Weirdest thing happend.
this guy walks past us (hes clearly homless or very poor). He hollers back to us asking if we are form edmonton and what area we both say downtown and hes chatting and we sort of start moving away and hes like "one more thing can u guys do me a favour?"
and so we say maybe. and then hes like
"If you guys dont give me any change i will tickle u to death" and hes giggling like crazy we both dont have any change and then he starts ticking my tummy. i step back and we both say sorry but we have to go and hes g9iggling and starts to yell "ha ha You have baby fat!!" then walks down the street yelling ti over and over


soo fucked up
and i feel fat now too

So fucking mad
Now Playing: i dont have speakers!

i was having a total blast hanging out with all my cousins for the first time in like 6 yrs. It was my Grampa and Grama's 40th wedding anniversary. I had been dreading it and the timing was inconvenient but it started out going amazingly well. Had a great little food fight ( a family tradition ) got some revenge on my dad and uncles with my cousins help. Usually these get together s degrade into screaming matches but this was going great.

My mother was kinda pissing me off (she hates this side of the family) I think she feels that shes better than them on some level. As such she was keeping a pretty short leash on my brother and i called her on it a couple of times ...I don't even think she realizes when shes being an insufferable bitch to ppl. My bro and nessa were talking and we came to the conclusion that she was overreacting so much and being a party pooper cuz she wanted to show this side of the family how well she raised us. She seems to have wanted us to be this ideal family that my dads brothers and sisters would be jealous of. Now i have to say that my dads side of the family is a bit of a train wreck but all in all the kids still managed to turn out ok (which i also think pissed my mom off in some weird way) anywho on with my story So we all got home from the hall at about 2:30 ish so we all went out to the back of the acreage to have a fire and drink more. I went inside to quickly borrowed my dads keys to get some stuff out of the trunk, he and my mom went to sleep at like 12. when i got them from him i told him i needed the keys to get my sleeping bag so i just kept the keys with me cuz i didn't want to bother them plus i wasn't sure if my bro and his gf would need anything while we were out back so i figured i would hold onto them. so were sitting around the campfire and he comes out and is like where are my fucking keys Aaron so im telling him to calm down cuz he seems randomly mad (like why would someone be mad about that)I don't have a history of stealing his car or anything even remotely bad like that. and hes like give me my goddam keys so i do and i tell him i still need to get stuff out of the trunk hes like go get it..i m like but i need the keys so were walking to the car and hes just layin into me and i told him that sometimes he treats his car better than he treats his kids The argument escalates as we walk then he calls me a fucking drunk and tries to throw me against a motor home. we start yelling at each other really loud (i m pretty sure all the aunts and uncles and cousins could hear) He eventually lets go of me i get the shit out of the trunk and leave and told him if he ever touched me again he would regret it.

So i go back to the fire and everyone was totally blown away by what happened ( including my aunt who has known my dad forever cuz she has never seen him like that)i guess thats cuz no one has ever seen my dad like that other then me and my brother and my mom and then this morning im packing up my car and my mom comes and tells me im in the wrong and that i have to apologize to him...i promptly told her that there was no chance in hell of that happening and she proceeded to call me a mean drunk and a mean person.

I think half the reason she is mad at me is because i ruined the facade that she had been putting up for all the relatives about our happy little family (image over substance is guess)She didn't even bother to get my side of the story and said i was being to emotional and getting to excited and then walked away. weird thing was, i wasn't all that drunk. i think i had about 6-8 drinks all night and most of them were in the early half of the night after supper. And i know for a fact that my dad had been drinking for quite some time. im waiting for an apology form both of them once my mom hears my side of the story from my brother and Nessa (that my dad was just looking for a fight)Cuz seriously who gets upset about fucking car keys?!?!?

What a a weird fucking weekend Met up with a chat budd from Montreal on Thursday and went to k-days (the exhibition) with him. He turned out to be a super cool guy. Went to a taste of Edmonton with him and his friend on Friday afterwards and a couple of my friends went to the gay bar for the first time (since my break up. Things got a little wild but in a good wholesome way. Im beginning to realize that i am a total relationship retard tho and i cant seem to figure out boys at all. One thing i am certain of is that i am totally unprepared to get into a new relationship and im really looking forward to meeting more ppl and making new friends.

On the work front things are looking waaay good. DA offered me a a permanent part time position during school doing techs support and websupport in addition to mu current research role. That and there is a photographer coming in form TIMES magazine tomorrow to do an article on AL (my boss) so i may even get some pics of me taken YAY thats enough typing for me now ciao

expanding my horizions and waistline
Now Playing: shhhhhhhhhh be wary wary quiet theres wabbits awound
SO thought i would give quick update of wahts going on. This hass been a week from hell
my body clock was all fucked up all week cuz i had been going into work wayyy early (for me at least) to work on this big project thats due next friday. Finnaly done most of the shitty fileing and database stuff (old flies are uber uber dusty tho i feel like i have been chain smoking this week)

Went to the coffe shop on wednesday all pumped about working for my first shift in a 100% smoke free enviroment...instead of pristine air i got a kick in the nuts. We lost 2/3rds of our customers due to the ban so they couldnt afford to pay me anymore so i got fuckin laid off! i had been working there 6 years it was kinda wierd to think that that could be my last shift there ever i miss my customers already. Im sure buisness will pick up tho.

Im looking at this as an purourunity to focus on other thhings that i have been negelcting (like my webdesign buisness) hey btw if anyone wwants a hip webpage for a great price email me lol
its like im reading the last chapter of a good book and all these loose ends are bing tied up but the ending leades to a new book thats has the same characters just new adventures and settings.

Its like my life is starting with a slate that i can wriet whatever i want on! its kinda exciting.

Went out with terry and mel after work on friday ate way to much at joey tomatoes ( istill havent told mel im Bi i dont want it to be awkward at work).

tonight i went over to sky and puals place for a BBQ initially iwas worried cuz i wouldnt know anyone but it turned out to be a blast! everyone was super fun and cool and i laughed soo hard. The food was amasing too i had the most amasing "caaaaak" (pronounced caaawk) lol It was like a chocolate orgasme. soo full tho!

And why are all the cute boys straight??? bah!

tired overworked 16 hour day tomm
basement is starting to look good blah blah blah

HELL LEVEL 2 Raw score: 80%

You're just about as deep in sexual hellfire as a person can get. Virtually no urge, however demented, will go ungratified; practically no boundary will go uncrossed. You're probably proud of your adventurousness, and, honestly, you should be. Few people are confident enough to pursue pleasure on their own terms. Your morals could sink a bit further, sure, but it's mostly likely that you've got a pretty good idea of what you're into and what you would do...above you're honest with yourself with what you want. If more people told the truth, you'd have a lot more company down in the flames. AVOID: the lost souls in sexual heaven and (above all) the denizens of sexual purgatory. You don't need any prudes or wishy-washers in your life.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 71% on hellish

Link: The Sexual HELL Test written by jason_bateman on Ok Cupid

thought that was pretty funny

blahhhhh
so thought i would check in. Had a very interesting day yesterday. Hung out on a really sweet patio with tim and Erin g talked and had a really nice time the weatehr was beutiful!. Then i went to ruby's bday thang that was pretty awsome too i laughed soo hard and met some really cool ppl.

Went dancing to new city it was nice to be in a bar with no smoking !! new city wasnt as fun as it was the first time. yesterday was the first time i had seen phil since the break up.. it was too soon for both of us and kind of awkward he danced on his own for most of the night. It was too bad we were all feeling so weird went home early then i stayed up watching the damn A channel late night movie soo stupid it was with paul walker and steve zahn and a cb radio and a crazy trucker... it wasnt horrible. got to sleep at 5 and had bad dreams..

Phil and I decided last night that we didnt have anything to say to eachother (we were supposed to meet up today) so i basically stayed home and moped around got some artwork done my personal site is getting close to being done yaya!

feeling really blah lateley. I know i need a big change in my life and i knwo what i need to do its just a matter of doing it ....sigh i have to stop being such a door mat

Your Birthdate: September 29

Your birthday on the 29th adds a tone of idealism to your nature. You are imaginative and creative, but rather uncomfortable in the business world. You are very aware and sensitive, with outstanding intuitive skills and analytical abilities. The 29 reduces to 11, one of the master numbers which often produces much nervous tension. This is the birthday of the dreamer rather than the doer. You do, however, work very well with people.

My libra love profile
Your positive traits:

You are open minded enough to date outside your typical "type" ... successfully!
You are diplomatic - and likely to end a fight instead of dragging things out.
You are easily loyal and faithful, but only for the right person.

(this is tottaly dead on)

Your negative traits:

You're a bit gullible, and partners take advantage of you. You still may not know it.
You find it difficult to decide where to go to dinner, what movie to watch, who to date...
You have to be in a relationship, or else you just don't feel like yourself.

(to a certain extent i am a bit indecicive)

Your ideal partner:

A smooth talker who enjoys socializing as much as you to.
Someone classy and cultured who knows which wine to order with dinner.
Is beautiful to you - although not necessarily attractive in the traditional sense.

(dead on)

Your dating style:

Romantic. If your date comes bearing flowers, wine, and poetry... well, your heart soars.

Your seduction style:

Giving. Your lover's pleasure is as important as your own. (dead on)
Soft and sensual - you don't like anything to be rough. pfft sooo wrong
Extravagant ... your fantasy involves staying at a five star hotel with your love. not even close but it is nice


Tips for the future:

Don't be so quick to compromise in relationships - and you'll get taken advantage of yes.
Try being single for a while. Seems impossible, but you'll learn so much about yourself from doing so.
Make some decisions about your romantic life, right now. You'll be happy that you did. ( and this is why i posted this i agree whole heartedly)

You Are 18 Years Old

18 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

atsrology is scary
Your Libra Drinking Style

"I'm jusht a social drinker," you slur, "it's jusht that I'm so damn social?"
You love nothing more than to party, mingle and relate to everyone.
Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with Insta-Friend device set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side (you are little instigators when bored), you can really work a room.

Charming as you are, you are notoriously lacking in self-control.
And this can get you into all sorts of trouble -- including wearing their wobbly boots waaaay too early in the evening.
You may end up flirting with you best friend's sweetie or even blacking out the night's events entirely. Oops!



thats so dead on its scary

(this was orignially writen on thursday but i decded to post it today)

a long time coming
So i met up with phil today.
I went in to this "talk" fully expecting that we were gonna take a 1 month break from each other just so we could sort things out.

We ended up tottaly broken up instead.

He said alot of things that surprised me. that unless somthing majour changes theres no point in gettting back together. The most surprising is that changed when i went into the buisness faculty. that i wasnt the same person and i guess not in a good way.

I never noticed b4 but i guess i did change alot when i switched over....add that to my list of things to ponder

If i had known going into buisness would have ruined our relationship i never would have done it. Add this to the list of reasons i hate my faculty.

I know we had alot of issues but wow its over.

I got home kinda shell shocked and could only get a hold of allision but she had soem stuff to do. so i faked being happy while the folks were around it was tough but i managed. To think i have been thinking about telling them about me and phil alot recently.

made myself som taquitos almost went for quiznos but i know that would have been to much for me...(phil and i used to go for quiznos once a month as like a date celibration thing) i didnt want to be crying as i ordered lol

so after the floks left i tried to drink but we dont have much alcohol so i couldnt really get drunk enough. Didnt have any icecream or chocolate
or cheese for nachos and i was too tipsy to go shopping in the car. So i figured killing things on the xbox would make me happy so i go to get all the stuff only to find that my bro hid all the games.

so i pnaicked cuz i had nothing to do and this overwhelming lonliness set in. tried to call ppl but no one asnwerd
then i called phil

i dont know why i wanted to make sure he was ok
i think i secretly wanted him to say that he wanted me back


par for the course however today he said none of the above.

its funny our "song" was "try" by nelly furtado and i always thought it was such a beutiful love song. But there is a line in it

"all of the momments that already past try to go back and make them last. All of the things we want eachotehr to be , we never will be , we never will be that wonderful. thats life"

And i realize how prophetic it is

i still hope one day that we will both be as wonderful